• The Man With The Gun

    A man walks into his back yard in the middle of the night and fires a gun. Due to his strange behavior he never sees another sunrise. (No, he did not kill himself.)

    Can you explain this odd occurrence?


    The man shot his rooster, which had awakened him with its crowing every morning for the past ten years. Since he had recently retired, there was no longer any reason to be wakened at such an early hour.

  • The Blind Men With the Socks

    There was a man who went to the mall where he bought 3 pairs of red socks and 3 pairs of white socks.Another man who had already bought 3 pairs of red socks and 3 pairs of white socks came back to return his 6 pairs. They were both blind.

    As they were walking, they bumped into each other. All the socks scattered around the floor, but each pair remained held together by a rubber band. Nobody helped them pick the socks up, but in 3 minutes they both had 3 pairs of red, and 3 pairs of white.

    How is that possible if they are blind?


    Each man took half the socks and pulled them apart. They would then give the other man 1 sock. They kept doing this until they had all their socks.

  • The Cowboy

    General Custer is surrounded by Indians and he’s the only cowboy left.

    He finds an old lamp in front of him and rubs it. Out pops a genie. The genie grants Custer one wish, with a catch. He says, “Whatever you wish for, each Indian will get two of the same thing.”
    Custer ponders a while and thinks:”If I get a bow and arrow they get two. If I get a rifle they get two!” He then rubs the bottle again and out pops the genie. “Well,” the genie asks “have you made up your mind?”

    What did Custer ask for to help him get away?


    One glass eye. (or one broken leg) 🙂

  • Hmm Hmm

    The Pope has it but he does not use it.
    Your father has it but your mother uses it.
    Nuns do not need it.
    Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one,
    Michael J. Fox’s is quite small.
    What is it?


    A surname. 🙂

  • Sherlock Holmes

    One snowy night, Sherlock Holmes was in his house sitting by a fire. All of a sudden a snowball came crashing through his window, breaking it. Holmes got up and looked out the window just in time to see three neighborhood kids who were brothers run around a corner. Their names were John Crimson, Mark Crimson and Paul Crimson. The next day Holmes got a note on his door that read “? Crimson. He broke your window.” Which of the three Crimson brothers should Sherlock Holmes question about the incident?


    Mark Crimson: “?” = question MARK, so the note on the door reads “Question Mark Crimson. He broke your window.”